I have been writing a birthday post for the last 4 years and got a little delayed this year but figured I’d rather write it late than never so here it is. As a tradition, I reflect and document on what life feels like in this season of life. You can read my birthday posts for prior years here, here and here.

• A few weeks back, I was at a workshop for work and the ice-breaker question was – If you had unlimited quantity of one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be and the first word out of my mouth was Love. The more I have grown the more I realize how important love is to me both in giving and receiving in the many different and beautiful ways love shows up in our lives.
• Sumit and the kids are my oxygen masks like no other. Our unit of 4 gives me joy and a sense of purpose that I most appreciate when I am not with them and I truly feel like something is missing. Yes, our lives can often feel crazy and there is a lot of chaos in our home but the love I receive and get to share is something I could have never imagined before I became a parent.
• As I reflect on the last year, I realize how important and also how hard it is to put on my own oxygen mask first, whether that means eating dinner before the rest of the family some nights to be fueled up for the second innings of my day or to say no to a kid’s birthday party because I need to put my energy elsewhere. I am realizing more and more that I’d rather be away for an hour or two replenishing myself vs. physically present for the family but not really there and ultimately feeling resentful for the intensity of my life.
• This is also a season in my life when I feel happiest and most comfortable in my skin and for who I am and what I have accomplished. Life isn’t perfect neither am I but I am able to love myself for how things are.
• No surprise but work and my experiences and relationships significantly influence the quality of my life and I need to very keenly aware of this dynamic to ensure I make choices such that work is an overall positive experience in my life.
• I have learnt that there is a very beautiful but a very fine line between contentment and ambition and knowing where to turn up the dial on one and the other is complicated but very critical for my overall joy!
• As a highly sensitive person, the people in my life and the strength of my relationships has a huge bearing on the quality of my life. As I grow older, this becomes even more evident. Sometimes this means truly focusing on strengthening the relationships I have, sometimes it means stepping away and saying no to certain people that are causing more hurt than joy. I finally did this with a relationship that was very difficult, and I am finding myself much happier.
• Courageous self – love and self-compassion is having the ability to love myself when loving myself feels hard and I don’t feel worthy of my own love. The only secret is to start somewhere, take baby steps, and keep moving up from there. It works! I struggled a lot with this at multiple times but happy report that I am ending the year strong.
• I am grateful for the choices I have made this year and the prioritization felt right yet given the myriad of passions and callings I have, there is always a little sadness around the things I didn’t get to do or experience. Oh well, need to focus on the done list😊
• I didn’t write as much or engage in as much creative work as I would have liked to. I am really itching to write a book or start a podcast someday or get my coaching certification done. Hopefully I’ll find a way to feed these desires though no concrete plans for this year.
• I had either been pregnant or breastfeeding for the last 5 years and this is the first year when I am not. I have tremendous satisfaction and joy in a job well done and immense gratitude for what the human body is capable of. And I also feel very grateful to have my body back and a tiny sliver of freedom to escape for a night without a pump or a kid who will cry profusely that mom is away for the night.
•  And as with many previous years, I still struggle with how self centered my life can often feel and how little I do to give back in the world. This is one thing on my list where I want to keep the curiosity and discontentment top of mind to ensure I channelize it into more action.

 

Huge than you to Dina Relles and Lindsey Mead who are the inspiration behind these birthday posts.